Square 1.

Earlier this evening, I was sprawled out across the living room couch scrolling through Instagram. As I thumbed through my news feed, I came across a video posted by @ucdavis that read in the caption, "Welcome aggies!" I knew exactly what it meant. I immediately sprung my limp body off the couch and bolted to my room to retrieve my laptop. I logged in to my UC Davis account and clicked on "application status." UC Davis has been my top choice for three years now, when I first thought I wanted to be a veterinarian. It is ranked number two under Cornell University for having the best veterinary science program in the country. Within milliseconds I would know what my future holds. Unfortunately, the future did not hold UC Davis in its hands.

I was rejected. 

My heart sank further and further each time I reread the dreadful line:

I regret that we are unable to offer you admission to UC Davis for fall quarter 2014.

It is truly a perfectionist's nightmare. I nearly pinched myself in hopes that perhaps I would wake up to find an acceptance letter had come in the mail. It was not an easy fact to accept. It still isn't. I was even embarrassed to pass the news on to my parents. I knew they would not be angry at me, in fact my dad's first words were, "Well it sucks to live up there anyway!" (He grew up in Sacramento, so he knows what it's like there). I knew deep down that the only one who would be angry at me, is me. 

Does anyone remember that game Sorry!? Remember how if your opponent landed in the same space as you, you had to move your pawn all the way back to the beginning? That is how I feel currently. I am back to square one. I am back in the What the heck am I going to do with my life? square. The fact that I haven't a single clue where I will be exactly six months from now is terrifying. 

However, I do believe that everything happens for a reason. There was a reason that UC Davis did not accept me. There is a reason the Cal Poly SLO and Sonoma State University did accept me. I have not told anyone this, but for several months now I have been doubting my future as a veterinarian. I love animals, they are and always will be a significant part of my life. But I do not know if that is what I want to do with my life anymore. Perhaps this is a sign that a profession in the veterinary field is not on God's itinerary for me. 

For now, I am still disappointed just by the fact that I was rejected. Like I said, rejection is not easy to accept. I will come around, though. A single letter from a single school does not define me. This goes for both acceptance as well as rejection letters. Like they say, "you win some, you lose some," At least, I think that is what they say. 

This is simply another hurdle thrown onto my path by the big man upstairs. I will overcome this. I will turn this obstacle into a navigating tool to help guide me from square one, to the square I was at previously, all the way to the last square on the game board. It may take me a while to get there, but for now I am on my way. 

Sorry this post was more of a journal entry than anything, but that's what a blog is after all, is it not? I just felt I needed to express my racing thoughts and feelings on paper-- er-- screen, that is. If you actually took the time to read this, you are a saint. Now go eat some pie. After all, it is Pi Day. (March 14/ 3.14)  

Oh, and play a nice game of Sorry! with your family while you're at it. ;)

What obstacles has God thrown you? How did you overcome them?
Do you celebrate Pi Day?

Currently: 3.9.14

Between Instagram and Blogspot, I follow a lot of people. I guess you could say I am a bit of a stalker. Some of my favorite "stalkees" include Julia and Amanda. You could say I have been in a bit of a "blogging rut" lately, so I am adopting this idea from them in hopes that it will help me get back into the swing of things. :) This post is just a little snapshot of what my life currently looks like.

Current Book: Think Twice by Lisa Scottoline. I discovered Scottoline and her incredible books about four years ago, and to this day cannot seem to move on to any other author. Her books have a haunting effect, and often I find myself thinking about them at the most random times. I think it's because the plot lines in each of her books are not "ghosts and graveyards" type of scary, rather they are realistic and things that could happen to anyone. I have not yet finished this one, but I predict I will not be disappointed. I highly recommend giving her a chance, you won't regret it.

Current Music: So, a little tidbit you may not know about me-- I'm a total country music freak. I mean I LOVE country music. I know, I know, go ahead and judge. Even my friends make fun of me for it, but I don't care! This is one of my current favorites. I even chose a popular one so you wouldn't get too bored. ;)

Current Guilty Pleasure: Dance Moms all the way. I don't watch a lot of TV, but I never miss a week of Dance Moms. I figure I spend seven hours every day working by butt off in school, one hour of reality TV every Tuesday can't be that damaging to the brain, right? 

Current Nail Color: Naked. Always naked. #lazygirlproblems

Current Drink: I don't buy these a whole lot as they are a bit pricey, but they are so good! They don't have that "fake sweet" taste (yuck) and they are perfectly refreshing on a hot day along the California coast. Panama Peach is my favorite.

Current Food: Looking back, I think I have had pizza at least once a week for the past 3 weeks now! This is huge for me, considering that before this I had not honestly enjoyed a slice of pizza for nearly two years. I figure I better get used to it now, because what will next year be like if I can't even indulge in the staple college food? 

Current Obsession: Ice skating. Weird, right? I've been going ice skating almost every weekend since Christmas break. I don't mean to brag, but I'm kind of getting good at it! Especially considering I've never taken a lesson in my entire life. 

Current Wish: To get a part in the school musical! I recently auditioned for a part in Peter Pan. I am in no way, shape, or form a singer, however I used to be part of the drama club in middle school and freshman year. When I moved in the tenth grade, I gave it up. Well, it is now my last semester of high school ever (what!?) and I am praying for one more chance to be on stage. Even if it is just a teensy, minor role, I will be so thankful!

Current Triumph: This may seem insignificant, but today I mastered my backbend-kickover! (or re-mastered, I should say) I was a gymnast up until middle school when I started doing other sports. While I was still athletic during that time, I lost basically all of my flexibility. Junior year I got my backbend kick over back, but it was when I was at one of my lowest weights. After I became weight restored and was able to exercise again, I realized my body was no longer capable of that with 20+ extra pounds on me. Well, after months of working on it, I have officially re-mastered the backbend kick over. I feel confident, strong, and healthy once again! And let me tell you-- it is a good feeling. 

Current Need: To start my term paper for AP Government. I may or may not have decided to write this instead. . . Oops. 

Current Bane of My Existence: Homework, homework, homework. Can you say senioritis?

Current Indulgence: Socializing! This may seem like a strange indulgence, but for the first time in my life ever I have been going out with my friends on the weekends and just having a great time. Country dances, birthday parties, movies, lunch dates, shopping-- just the typical high-schooler life. I love it! I love having friends. I love being able to stay out until 3 a.m. from time to time. I love feeling free. 

Current Blessing: I am currently thankful to have my job back. My eating disorder took a lot away from me, and one of those things happened to be the best job I have ever had. I was forced to quit my job at the dog kennel in exchange for eating disorder treatment. Now, I can proudly say I am back at with the doggies and thanking God for it every minute I am there. Money and puppies all in one? Yes please! 

Current Excitement: I can't wait for next weekend because there is a huge country spring fling at school! Being the country music obsessed girl that I am, you can assume I am beyond ecstatic for this night. I can assure you there will be plenty of pictures to come. :) 

Current Mood: At peace. I have been home alone all weekend, and the silence within the house has just put me in an incredibly relaxed state. I could definitely get used to this. 

Current Link: This is my favorite Ted Talk. Lizzie is an incredibly inspirational, beautiful, humorous girl. She has overcome so much and made such a difference in so many people's lives. I am also currently (haha, "currently") reading her book. If you haven't heard of her, please check her out!

I am going to start doing these "currently" posts every month, as I really like the idea and think it's a good way to reflect on the little things in life every once in a while. And in the meantime, be sure to check out Julia and Amanda's blogs! They are both so well written, inspiring, and always entertaining. 

• Are you currently obsessed with anything?